


Quid Pro Quo

by mrsmischief



Series: Quid Pro Quo [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-13
Updated: 2012-12-20
Packaged: 2017-11-21 01:21:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/591829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrsmischief/pseuds/mrsmischief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-Avengers AU: Loki gets punished for what he did, but the punishment isn't what he expected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Punishment

_London_

Luke Smith woke up. It was dark around him in his bedroom, so it must’ve still been night. His whole body was trembling, his tired muscles shaking with the emotion he didn’t understand. He sat up slowly, lifting his palm up to wipe the black strands of hair off his sweaty forehead, breathing in deeply. “Not again,” he pleaded weakly, leaning his face into his hands, “not again…”

* * *

_Asgard_

Everything had gone according to his plan. Everything. When Thor walked him in through the magnificent golden gates of Asgard, Loki still couldn’t believe it. He had doubted the plan, feared it would all go wrong, that there would be something he hadn’t taken into consideration, some twist in Thor’s character he had forgotten. But, in the end, all his worries had been meaningless: the group of heroes (he laughed quietly at the idea, what kind of heroes didn’t suspect anything after gaining victory over him this easily?) had done exactly as he had assumed they would. He had relied on their humane reactions, their sense of righteousness and honesty, and they hadn’t failed him. Yes, he had gained a few injuries along the way, but none of that mattered now. He was back in Asgard.

They had flung him into the smallest and darkest cell in the dungeons, but Loki didn’t mind. He knew it was only a matter of time before they came and brought him in front of Odin. The Allfather was guaranteed to be angry with him, furious even, but Loki knew his punishment wouldn’t be too bad. Some scolding, promises to behave better in future, maybe some more time in the dungeons? If Odin was feeling particularly vengeful they might sew his lips shut or give him only venom to drink… But whatever they’d do, it couldn’t be the worst thing he had experienced. The Allfather was too weak, too gentle to truly punish, to hurt him. Even now, after his true parentage had been revealed, when Odin would have no obligations towards him, nothing to hold him back, he wouldn’t do it. Loki knew that much.

He had been kept in his prison for days, or so he thought. In the darkness measuring time was difficult, so he couldn’t be sure. No one come there, to see him or even to talk to him. Someone must have been down there though, when he was asleep, since when he woke up he found some food on a tray by the door. He wasn’t hungry, so he had left it there. He didn’t mind the loneliness. Being alone in the darkness gave him time to think, to plan his revenge, and he liked it.

When they finally came for him, Loki was ready. He stood up, putting a pleasant, non-threatening smile on his face as he heard the keys turn in the lock of the door. When the door opened and he saw the two men, however, all his pretences disappeared. The smile faded from his face, replaced by a true emotion: surprise.

“Thor? _Odin_?” he asked, taken aback. He had been expecting some regular guards, pr maybe even Sif (oh, she must have been dreaming of a chance to punch him), but certainly not a private audience from the two men he had considered his family for so long.

“Loki,” Odin said slowly, “my son.” Loki’s eyes narrowed, his features hardening. “I never was-“ “To me you were, still are, and that is why your recent actions sadden me,” Odin snapped, interrupting him. He started pacing back and forth in the small space in front of Loki, who sat back down on the hard bed.

“What am I to do with you?” Odin asked after a while, turning to look at Loki again. “You have done against me, your king, your father, and against all that is - was - good in you. Is there any of that left anymore?” he asked, his face a mask of disappointment.

Loki looked up at him, saying nothing. He then turned his gaze at Thor, who hadn’t said anything, either. Thor had always been easier to read than Odin (or Loki himself), and so it was this time as well. His emotions were visible on his face. Loki had been expecting to find anger or resentment, but instead he found… sadness? It was written clearly on Thor’s strong features. This made Loki suspicious - what was The Allfather planning?

Loki frowned, waiting for Odin to speak again. It took a while, which made Loki even more puzzled. Surely it couldn’t be that hard to declare his punishment? What was Odin waiting for?

Then, suddenly, it dawned on him. An apology! That was it. “I’m not going to apologise,” Loki said quietly. “I don’t regret anything.” Odin sighed, and turned his back to Loki. It was as if he had had some means of silent communication with Thor; neither of them said a word, but after a few moments Thor nodded slowly, looking even more crushed. Odin turned back to Loki, his eyes harder, showing no emotion at all. “Loki,” he said, his voice harder as well, ringing with authority and power. “I, Odin Allfather, banish you from Asgard. You will not return, nor see any of us again. You cannot move between realms anymore. You will live in Midgard, trapped there until the end of your days.” Loki laughed. “And what do you think will keep me there?” he asked, sneering. ”Your sweet words?” “No,” Odin said. “Your own memories.”


	2. Struggles

_Asgard_

Loki’s head was spinning. He felt sick. He watched the colours dance before his eyes, listened to the humming noise inside his head. Whether that was all real or just the product of his mind, he wasn’t sure. He only knew he felt awful; horrible tastes creeping into his mouth as he pressed his eyes closed, memories flicking into his mind, memories he didn’t even remember having. He leaned his back against the wall, trying to pull air into his lungs. 

“My… memories?” he managed to ask, his voice hoarse. He slowly opened his eyes again, but even that felt like too much effort. He shivered with nausea as his feverish eyes found Odin, who was still standing in front of him. Even if The Allfather said something, Loki didn’t hear it anymore. The blackness was edging closer, starting on the edges of his vision, swallowing his world…

 

* * *

 

_London_

After a few hours of useless attempts to sleep, Luke got up. He sat up slowly, feeling his body, and when he judged himself to be well enough he stood up and made his way to the bathroom. 

He still felt a bit shaky, but splashing some cold water on his face helped. He leaned his hands against the sink, trying to compose himself. He lifted his gaze up, staring at himself in the mirror. He was a mess. His skin looked even paler than usual, the dripping water enveloping it under shiny wetness. There were dark circles under his eyes, but that was nothing new. What really scared him were his eyes: they were wild, even greener than usual, still haunted by the dream. Luke shook his head, trying to clear all the nightmarish thoughts away, and grabbed a towel, drying his face with it. When he was done he dropped the towel on the edge of the sink and walked into the kitchen, thinking that surely a cup of coffee would make him feel better again. 

“Luke, hi! How are you?” an enthusiastic, high-pitched voice called out from behind him. He turned to  see a short girl with dark brown hair and wide smile.  
“Hi Liz. OK, thanks, and you?”  
“Good, good! Any plans for the weekend?” the girl asked. Luke looked down at her and sighed. Her small brown eyes were lit up with false hopes again. Luke knew she fancied him, but there was no way anything would ever happen between them. He wasn’t boyfriend material at all with all his traumas and weirdness, she deserved someone normal. And besides, she was the closest thing he had to a friend, he wasn’t going to ruin that.  
“No, not really,” he said as they continued to walk towards the auditorium where their lecture would be held.   
“Wanna come to the cinema with me, then? I’ve got two free tickets and I need to use them by the end of the month…”

Luke kept quiet for a while, thinking of an excuse or a distraction or anything that would help him out of this. His body offered it for him. He had just opened the door to the auditorium when his knees suddenly felt weak, and he staggered, almost falling down on the floor. He managed to regain his balance, but as he straightened up a sharp pain cut across his head, making it feel as if his brain was being pulled apart. He cried out loud, his hand rising to clutch his head as his eyes closed with the crushing pain.  
“Luke! Luke!” he heard Liz’s alarmed voice as if behind a closed door, faint and blurred. Somehow she managed to walk him to their usual seats, and finally he felt the familiar hard chair under him.   
“Thank you,” he whispered when he dared to open his eyes again. Liz was looking at him, her dark eyes filled with worry. “Are you OK?” she asked, her hand reaching out to touch his arm.   
“Yeah, I’m just having a headache or something…”

Luke managed to get through the lecture, and even make notes, even though after it he wouldn’t have even been able to tell what it was all about. He worked automatically, his brain trying to make sense of all that was happening to him. When it finally ended Liz still clung to him, wanting to make sure he was fine.   
“I’m alright Liz, thank you…” he said when he got back to his car.   
“Are you sure you can drive?” she asked, her eyes narrowing.  
“Yes, I feel fine,” he said as he sat down on the driver’s seat.  
“Ok then… I’ll give you a call about the cinema! Bye!” she said and waved as he closed the door. Breathing in deeply, he turned the key and fastened his seat belt. He looked around, trying to make sure no one was on his way as he reversed on the busy parking lot. When he saw no one he started to roll back slowly. He turned his gaze to the rear view mirror and almost screamed. He saw himself, but it was not really  _him_. The face was the same, but his expression… The man in the mirror was smiling, but his smile wasn’t a pleasant one. It was a horrifying, evil smile that made his features look distorted. Luke blinked, and when he looked in the mirror again, he saw only himself, the usual him. He shook his head slowly and hit the gas again. 

_“What the hell is wrong with me?”_  he asked quietly as he made his way out of the parking lot and onto the road home.


	3. Friday Night Lights

_London_

Luke was tempted to go back to his old habit and have a cigarette (or ten), but when he got home he promised himself to at least try the healthy way to calm his nerves first. He put on his running shorts and took his mp3 player, finding the most aggressive and loud music he could to accompany his steps. At first his running didn’t go well, his legs felt stiff and his muscles were struggling, but then, after he had passed some magical line, it all suddenly clicked. He felt almost like he was flying, his feet rising up and never touching the ground again, he was rising up to the beautiful, slowly setting sun. Trent Reznor’s voice was filling his ears, and as he picked up more speed the lyrics seemed more than appropriate for him:  _“Help me get away from myself…”_

When he got back home he noticed his someone had tried to reach him; he had a text and two missed calls in his phone. He read the text first. 

_“Got the tickets still. No plans. Let’s just choose something to watch and go. Wanna come?”_

It was from Liz, of course. She had also been the one calling him, so she must have been quite anxious to go. Luke picked up the phone, deciding he might as well try to enjoy life, despite the weird things happening to him. He began to stretch his tired muscles as he waited her to pick up the phone.   
“Hi Liz,” he said when he finally heard her voice. “Yeah, sure I could come with you… What time?”  
“Hold on,” she said and he heard her clicking the mouse of her computer.   
“There’s a film I’d like to see starting at 6.30, that OK?” she asked after a while.  
“That’s fine, I just need to have a shower and eat something, I just came from a run,” he said, more thinking aloud. “Are we meeting at the cinema or..?”  
“Yeah, that’s fine! I’ve booked our tickets, the cinema’s the one we went once before if you remember?”  
“Yeah, I do. OK, see you then!” Luke said, and they hung up. He found himself smiling and actually looking forward to it, which he thought was marvellous considering the lack of interest in life he had been suffering. 

Luke was at the cinema ten minutes early, and stood by the doors, waiting to catch sight of Liz. After a couple of minutes he saw her familiar figure  dashing towards him, smiling brightly like she always did.  
“Great, you made it!” she said and hugged him. The gesture still surprised him and made him freeze, even though it was nowhere near the first time she had done it. He recovered quickly and hugged her back, annoyed with his fear of physical contact. He decided to put away all his fears and terrors, if just for these few hours with her. He could enjoy life and let bad dreams be just bad dreams, right?

“This film is horrible,” Liz whispered after maybe half an hour. Luke chuckled and turned to look at her. He could just make out her face in the lit coming from the screen.  
“I know, why did you even want to see this?” he whispered back.  
“I don’t know, I read some good reviews and it seemed good… Well, it’s not!”  
“No, I think this might be the worst film I’ve ever seen…”   
They didn’t leave the cinema though, they had come all the way down there, so they decided to stay and watch the whole thing. They couldn’t resist taking the mickey though, and had a hard time suppressing their laughter.   
“That was… unbelievably bad,” Liz said as they exited the cinema. “Do you want to go somewhere and have a drink maybe? To make us forget those two hours and eleven minutes we just wasted on that crap?”

* * *

_Asgard_

“How is he?” Thor asked, striding towards Heimdall, who was standing in his usual position. There was no need telling who he meant, it was more than obvious. The Gatekeeper’s golden eyes seemed to look at something Thor couldn’t see (which actually was the truth), and he sighed.   
“He is happy, Thor,” he said, his deep voice revealing no emotion.   
“Happy?” Thor asked, frowning slightly. Could he really..?  
“Happy. Or as happy as he can be.”  
“What do you mean, Gatekeeper?”  
After Heimdall had told Thor the little he knew, The Thunderer stayed silent for a long while, thinking. When he finally spoke again, his voice was stern, leaving no room for disagreement.   
“Open the Bifrost, Heimdall.”

* * *

_London_

“Can we have a second round?” Liz asked, looking at him with pleading eyes. He considered it for a second, then remembered his plan of having fun and forgetting about all the bad things.   
“Yeah, sure,” he said, smiling brightly at her. She returned his smile as he leaned over the bar and asked for another pints for both of them.   
“Luke… I’ve really enjoyed this,” she said after they got their drinks and went to sit down in the corner of the pub where they could talk. “I really like your company.”  
Luke borrowed some time to think by taking a swig from his beer, but even after he had swallowed the drink he wasn’t sure what to say. He stuck to the easiest option, the polite one.  
“And I yours,” he said warmly, looking deep into her coffee-coloured eyes. Her smile widened even more, and she took his hand over the table, gently squeezing it.   
“I like seeing you happy and relaxed like this,” she said. 

After they finished their drinks she excused herself to go to the ladies’ room before leaving. He waited for her at their table, entertaining himself with his old hobby: looking at people and imagining what they were like and what they did for living, what their dreams were and who they loved. He had just created three full life stories when he saw her return out of the corner of his eye. He got up and started to walk towards her, his eyes fixed on her smiling face. 

However, on his way through the crowd he managed to bump into a man, a very tall man - the blond man was even taller than him, and Luke was a tall man as well.  
“Sorry!” he said quickly, looking at the man apologetically. The stranger turned to look at him, his ice-blue eyes examining him from head to toe before he replied.  
“It’s OK, no worries,” he said quietly. Even in the noisy pub his deep voice made Luke’s nerves tingle. He knew this man, he was sure of it. Everything from the stranger’s blond hair to his calm voice seemed so familiar…   
“I’m sorry, have we met before?” he asked, looking at the man in the pub’s dim yellow light. But before the stranger could answer Luke felt something small bump into his side, and looking down he saw Liz, who took his hand.   
“Come on Luke, let’s go!” she said eagerly, pulling him towards the door. Seeing he had no choice Luke followed her, but turned to look back at the door. The man’s gaze was fixed on him, and as their eyes met it felt as if electric shocks were running through his whole body. He was sure he knew the man somehow, but he had no idea how or where from.


	4. First Breath After Coma

_London_

Thor looked silently as Loki disappeared with the Midgardian girl. He was sure he had seen a glimpse of recognition in his eyes, but he was also certain that Loki - or  _Luke_  - had no idea of his own true identity. Whether that was a good or a bad thing, the Thunderer wasn’t sure…

“Are you sure this is a good idea, Liz?” Luke asked, his breathing heavy.   
“This isn’t going to ruin our friendship, is it?” he panted out as she slid her hand down his chest, reaching for his belt. They had managed to get back to her place somehow, and were now following the dangerous yet tempting path their drunken brains had led them into. The second they had walked into her apartment they had been on each other, hands on each other’s shoulders and neck and hair while their lips and tongue met for the first time, exploring the unknown territory.   
“Well, I guess it depends…” she replied cheekily, looking up at him.   
“On what?” he asked, leaning down to touch her lips with his again.   
“On how good friends you considered us to be,” she said against his lips, her hand sliding under his boxers. He didn’t say anything, just closed his eyes at her touch, letting go and enjoying the moment.

 

*

 

Luke couldn’t sleep, no matter how relaxed his muscles were. He lay down in Liz’s bed, listening to her deep breathing - she had fallen asleep easily, right afterwards. His mind was racing, however, the old feelings of stress and panic returning. He was afraid of sleeping, he knew the nightmares would return if he fell asleep now. Instead, he tried to keep himself awake with everything he could. He shifted his position every time he felt too relaxed, he even tried to find the most uncomfortable ones he could. When that didn’t seem to help anymore, he sat up, rubbing his face with his hands.

Finally, Luke stood up and walked over to the window, moving the curtain slightly so that he could see outside. It was dark, but he could make out the silhouettes of the buildings nearby with the lights of the city. Looking up in the sky, he saw the moon and stars, shining bright on the clear night sky. As he watched the white, glowing lights he felt a sudden pang of sadness and longing that he couldn’t understand. He had always been fascinated by the starry skies and northern lights and basically anything one could see up there, but this was something different. The feeling was stronger, a heart-wrenching pain.

He was about to turn away from the window when his caught movement right on the edges of his field of vision. He tried to look closer, but whatever had been outside the building on the other side of the street had now melted into the shadows, and he couldn’t see it again.

Luke sighed and went back to bed, slowly easing himself under the covers again. He was nervous about the morning; he knew Liz wouldn’t regret anything, but he wasn’t so sure of himself. It wasn’t that he didn’t like her - as the events had progressed that night he had admitted to himself that maybe all his feelings for her weren’t entirely platonic - but he was afraid she wouldn’t want anything to do with him if he truly let her close and told her about the things bothering him. Such as that shadow, which for a small moment had looked so much like that man in the pub…

 

*

 

When Thor noticed Loki in the window, he quickly pulled back, hiding in the shadows. He was surprised to find his brother still there; he had quietly followed Loki and the girl, and had assumed Loki would have left after he got what he was after… But he hadn’t. Maybe there was more to The Trickster than any of them had known. Maybe there still was goodness left in him. Maybe he truly cared for the Midgardian girl.  _Maybe…_

He stood in the shadows, thinking. If his assumptions were right, it might mean that there was a way Loki could come back home. However, Thor was also almost certain that his old memories were slowly coming back. The Allfather was powerful, but Loki’s mind was so twisted and unpredictable that there must have been dark places even Odin couldn’t find. Places, where the old Loki still was, waiting. If that was the case, Thor thought, there might be consequences no one could foresee…

*

 

Luke woke up to Liz’s chirpy voice in the morning.   
“Good morning!” she said when he opened his eyes. She had already showered and dressed, and looked positively glowing as she walked over to the window and opened the curtains, letting the sunshine in.   
She came over to his side of bed and leaned down to give him a kiss.

“I’ve made breakfast if you’d like some,” she said. Luke slowly got up, still thoroughly confused. He hadn’t meant to fall asleep at all, but there he was. He must have slept more than in a very long time, and for once his sleep had been undisturbed. He felt… good. Actually, he felt marvellous: he had energy, he wasn’t scared or anxious after bad dreams, and he was…  _happy_.   
“Yes, I’d like some, thank you,” he said, smiling, and pulled her closer for another kiss. 

 

 


	5. Delirium

_Asgard_

“But what if that is true? What if he  _is_  coming back?” Thor’s quiet voice was echoing in the great golden hall, desperate and uneasy. His mother looked at him, and then reached her hand up to brush his cheek with her fingers. After a moment of looking deep into his eyes, Frigga spoke.  
“Then there’s nothing we can do. Go, and keep an eye on him for us. Save the girl. Save  _him_.”

* * *

_London_

Over the following weeks Luke found himself getting more and more comfortable with the idea of having something more than just a friendship between him and Liz. They hadn’t talked about what happened, neither of them knew what to say, but somehow they just slipped into something that could develop into a relationship. Mostly they did the same things they had done before this as well, but there was a different kind of undertone now; the affection had taken a more visible form. Luke felt happier and more relaxed, and even his nightmares had left him. He hadn’t had any for almost two weeks.

It was just a regular Monday morning when he saw that man again. The man from the pub. Luke was driving home, and as he stopped at the traffic lights his gaze turned to the nearby construction site. There the blond man was, working like the rest of the people there. Even though his back was turned Luke was sure it was him, who else it could have been?

The sound of someone honking their horn impatiently behind him brought Luke back to reality. He hit the gas and drove home, trying not to think about the man and the feelings he had had after meeting him. Did he know the man? If he did, why didn’t he remember him?

*

“Fancy a TV night?” Luke asked, leaning his hand to the side and holding his mobile between his cheek and his shoulder as he opened the door to his flat. It was Saturday, and he felt even better than he had at the beginning of the week. 

“Sure, what’s on?” Liz asked. She sounded her usual, excited self, which didn’t surprise Luke one bit - there were few things that she wasn’t interested in or fascinated by. Sometimes he even wished he could have her eternally optimistic view on life, it would make everything easier… Or at least nicer.   
“I just got that Game Of Thrones box set, finally!” Luke replied cheerfully as he placed the plastic bag on the sofa.  
“You coming then?”  
“Damn, yes! Do you want me to bring something to eat? Like snacks?”  
With some more discussing the night’s plan was settled. Luke pulled the DVD box out of the bag, smiling to himself. He didn’t have much expectations on how the night would go, but he found himself looking forward to it. Looking forward to  _seeing her_ , to be honest, at the moment he didn’t care much at all about the DVDs. 

“Stop that Liz, I’m trying to focus!” he cried out, pulling his body away from her as her quick fingers tickled his side.   
“And I’m trying to avenge you laughing at his death! It wasn’t funny!” Liz said, lunging towards him. She flung her body against his, knocking the bag of crisps off his hand. He laughed and defended himself by grabbing her arms, and placing his around her.   
“I won,” he whispered before gently touching her lips with his.

Liz was practically dancing inside her head. She felt like throwing confetti, putting on a party hat and going outside to run on the street and declare her happiness. She had been friends with Luke for a long time, and she had had an enormous crush on him just as long. She had tried not to act on it, though, unsure about how he would react. Now, after that one night together and with the change in the way he was around her - not so nervous and guarded anymore - she was more confident. She pressed her lips tighter against his, her hands making their way up to his shoulders, holding on tight. 

Suddenly, Luke pulled away.   
“Where am I?” he asked, looking around himself with a confused expression. Liz could sense something new, something  _odd_  about him, put she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.   
“You’re in your own flat, Luke,” she said and leaned back towards him, hoping another kiss would bring him out of this weird state of mind.   
“Luke?” he asked slowly, sounding almost amused. This time Liz pulled back voluntarily, looking at him with narrowed eyes.  
“Yes, Luke, that’s your name, you silly! What is this, some kind of a game? I’m totally OK with role-playing and that kinds of things, but could you please just give me a warning first next time…” She rambled on, trying to ease her growing discomfort by talking as much and as fast as she could. Maybe that would bring him back to his senses…  
“No, you misunderstood me, girl,” Luke said, grabbing her chin and making her look at him. Liz finally understood what bothered her about him: his eyes. They weren’t the gentle, soft green anymore, they were piercing and bright and glowing like a maniac’s stare. They were  _burning_. He smiled coldly before speaking.  
“My name is not Luke. I am Loki, of Asgard.”


	6. Hurt

_London_

“Loki? Asgard?” Liz asked, incredulous. “OK Luke, you’ve been reading too much of those myths again, I think you really shouldn’t, you get too much into them…”  
Luke - Loki? - just smiled at her, but the emotion never reached his eyes. Liz was getting scared now, she had never seen him like this, and he didn’t look like himself at all.   
“Luke, please let me go,” she begged, her voice barely a whisper.   
“When will you understand? I am  _not_  Luke,” he replied, anger flashing in his eyes. He let go of her, pushing her away with force, so that she fell back on the sofa and hit her head on the armrest. She whined quietly, watching him as he stood up and paced around in the small apartment.   
“I think I’ll need-” he began, but then his face suddenly twisted with pain. He knelt down, his hands clutching his head. Liz froze for a moment, but then her feelings for Luke won, and she hurried to him, kneeling down next to him.   
“What’s the matter?” she asked, and as he opened his eyes and looked at her she didn’t recognise Luke anymore. This wasn’t him.   
“Leave… me,” he said, panting, and when she didn’t move, his hand came up and slapped her across her cheek, knocking her down. She lifted her fingers to touch the tingling skin. She looked at him, suddenly beyond fear - she was full of disgust. She watched as he closed his eyes again, grimacing as tears fell down his cheeks; he must have been in great deal of pain. Then, all of a sudden, he fell down, unconscious.

Liz crawled closer to him, seeing his features return back to those she knew. His mouth wasn’t a hard line anymore, and he looked almost peaceful in this fragile state. After a moment he began to stir, and she pulled away again, not knowing what to expect. When he opened his eyes she saw that they were full of confusion, and as he saw her reddened cheek he looked upset.   
“Liz..? What just happened?” he asked, his eyes pleading with her to explain it somehow.   
“Luke, I… I don’t know, you went crazy somehow… You thought you were Loki,” she said hesitantly.   
“Loki?” he asked, frowning. “The Norse god?”  
“Apparently, or someone with the same name anyway… You were really frightening,” she said, tears beginning to flow down her cheeks. His eyes were full of concern now, and he got up, trying to get closer to her. She pulled back quickly, getting up as well.   
“No, don’t,” she warned, backing away towards the door.   
“What, Liz, what’s wrong? What happened?” he asked, his mouth falling open - he looked like a lost child, but Liz had made her decision.   
“You hit me, Luke, that’s what,” she said, taking her jacket and quickly putting it on.   
“I’m sorry, but that’s just too much, I can’t do this if that can happen again… I suggest you get help.”  
“Liz, I-“  
“No, really Luke, just don’t. This can’t work for us right now, maybe not ever… Goodbye.”

Luke stared after her even long after the door had closed. So this was it, his worst fears had finally come true. The presence of something more than him, something strange, had finally got a grip on him. He had always known it was there, somewhere in the darkest corner of his mind, but he had tried to ignore it.

It had been different in his dreams, there the stranger inside his head was freer, there he had more power. He had seen things that he knew couldn’t be true, yet somehow they felt so real. In fact, they felt as if they had really happened to _him_. He had been cautious, not really letting anyone close to him because of his worries, but somehow Liz had got past all his defences - and she had paid the price for that.

For a moment Luke considered doing what she had told him to do. Perhaps talking to a professional could help… But then again, who would believe him? They would think he was insane, force drugs on him or even put him into a hospital he’d never get out of… He wouldn’t have that. He wouldn’t become a prisoner of his own mind. There was only one way he could get out of this. It wouldn’t be easy, but he had to do it, for him and for Liz.

 

*

 

Thor had almost fallen asleep in the house he slept in, when something alerted his senses. It was something he hadn’t felt for a long time…  _Loki_. Though Loki was adopted, they had always been as close as real brothers, possibly even closer. They didn’t need a bond of blood, their spiritual connection was tighter than anything like that could be.   
“Could he be..?” Thor asked himself, easing himself out of bed and putting his clothing back on. He decided to check on Luke just in case, it wouldn’t do anyone any harm to make sure everything was alright…

When he got to Luke’s apartment he felt that something wasn’t right. It was too… quiet. He didn’t feel Luke the way he usually sensed him - or sensed Loki, to be exact - he didn’t feel anything at all. Finding the door unlocked, he rushed in. He found Luke laying on the sofa, unconscious. For a moment Thor thought that he was just sound asleep, but then he noticed that Luke was absolutely still,  _too_  still. Thor placed his ear next to Luke’s mouth, and heard no sign of breathing. Quickly, his fingers wrapped around the man’s thin wrist. 

No pulse.


	7. Help

_London_

“Loki!” Thor cried out loud, desperately trying to wake the man. He knew waking dead wasn’t something he could do, and bargaining with Hel was literally hell… so that only left him one option. For the first time in his long life he was truly glad that he had accommodated to the Midgardian lifestyle as well as he had, and even learned some basic first aid skills. That was all he could do now. That, and praying. 

“Loki, please don’t be dead, please…”

 

*

 

Luke wasn’t dead. Yes, his pulse had disappeared for a moment, but his mind was still there. In fact, his mind wouldn’t  _let_  him die. The presence kept him alive, and even though it was not in charge anymore Luke couldn’t fight it enough to win.   
“But I don’t want to live!” he cried out silently, knowing the presence could hear him.  
“It’s not your decision; you are not even really you, you are  _me_ ,” it said. “I have stopped the poison spreading in our body; in fact, it is now as if it never was there. You may come back to life, if you so wish.”  
“You know that’s not what I wished…”

 

*

 

“What are you doing here?!” Luke exclaimed breathily, sitting up. Thor pulled back, startled by his sudden awakening.   
“Loki!” he said, a smile spreading across his face. Luke sighed, and fell back down to the sofa.   
“I am not Loki,” he said, sounding exhausted, “but I assume that’s what everyone thinks now… Care to explain why I would be a god from ancient Scandinavian mythology? As far as I know I’m not ancient… or Scandinavian for that matter.”  
Thor smiled, relief washing over him. Loki wasn’t dead - but he wasn’t himself, either. Thor considered his options for a moment, deciding that maybe truth was the best choice now.   
“Because  _I_ am, and I’ve known you all my life,” he said, and began to tell his story.

“I am Thor, the god of thunder,” he said, a bit proudly. “I am from Asgard, and I am the son of Odin Allfather. You are my brother.” He paused to pull a deep breath.   
“I feel like I’m responsible for this in some way. We were raised together. We fought together. You were my brother in arms and my best friend. We were both raised to be kings. But then, a couple of years ago our life fell apart…”

Luke listened, curious, as Thor told his story. It was a great story. A story of a kingdom far up in heavens, of a king and two princes; one strong and brave, the other quick and cunning. Thor and Loki. This man and him. Could it really be?

“…and then you were cast here, to Midgard, without your memories. Or well, with  _false_  memories,” Thor ended his story, turning back to look at him after staring at his hands for so long.   
“What, you’re saying everything I remember is a lie?” Luke asked, incredulous. This man, whoever he was, had clearly lost it.   
“Basically.”  
“Wow, you’re even crazier than I am… But that’s the best explanation I’ve got,” Luke said reluctantly.   
“I know it sounds crazy. But you must believe me, it is the truth,” the man said, looking at him with a serious expression.   
“So… OK, even if it is… What can I do about it? I mean, if I am Loki and Loki is me…” Luke said, his head feeling heavier by the second.   
“I don’t know… I have no idea what he might do, if he got control over you again… Or, I should say, what  _you_  would do, since you are Loki just as much that darker side of him is.”

The two men discussed the matter for a long time, until they could see the first faint light of dawn from the windows.   
“I should go…” Thor said, looking out. Luke sat up, looking after the man as he walked towards the door.   
“No, please… Stay. I wouldn’t want to be alone. And I don’t think I have any friends left anymore…”

Thor turned, hearing Luke’s voice. He looked at him, the sad green eyes and the pleading gaze. He nodded, smiling kindly.  
“Of course I will stay, brother.”

Luke sighed, running his hand through his black hair, and smiled as well.   
“Thank you,” he said. No one had ever looked at him like that. No one had ever been there for him the way this stranger was. No one had ever called him ‘brother’.  It felt odd, Luke thought, being cared for like this. But it also felt really, really good.

 

*

 

After talking for a moment more with Thor, Luke headed for the shower and bed; he was absolutely exhausted. The day had been so long it felt more like a year or a decade than just a small fragment of time.

As he stood in the shower, letting the warm water flow over him, he tried to take all of this in. So he was a mythological creature? Someone he had read about and always been fascinated by? A  _god_? And he had a brother? A family? Did they still care about him? What would they do to him? Could this all even be real, or was he just having an extremely vivid dream?

“Oh, it  _is_  all very much real,” the voice inside his head said.   
“And soon… I will be real, as well.”


	8. Moving On

_London_

In the morning, Thor woke up to Luke’s cheerful whistling. He had slept the night on his sofa, not wanting to leave Luke alone in the state he had been in. He opened his eyes slowly, seeing Luke bustle around in the kitchen, making coffee and preparing breakfast. 

“Oh, good morning!” he said joyfully when he noticed Thor had woken up. “Would you like something to eat?” he asked after a moment when Thor was still just staring at him with a blank face.  
“Yeah, sure…” Thor said slowly, sitting up and stretching his aching back. “What makes you so happy?” he asked curiously, remembering how Luke had been the night before.   
“Oh, well, I figured there isn’t much I can do about my so-called condition,” Luke said, shrugging. “I thought I might as well try to enjoy my life, anyway… And I feel so much more like myself today,” he explained, smiling happily as he set the table for them.  
“Breakfast will be ready in just a few minutes!”

Thor shook his head, thinking Luke was exactly like Loki with his mood swings. But he had to admit this was way better than the sad, miserable man he had seen last night. Slowly, Thor stood up and walked to Luke’s small kitchen, still eyeing his brother - or the man his brother had turned into - with slight suspicion. Was he just hiding his true feelings behind this facade of happiness? Or had he truly found some sort of peace with the man living inside him?

After having what might be called ‘the most awkward breakfast ever in any of the Nine Realms’, Thor left Luke’s flat. He had made sure Luke had his mobile number, and even though his physical presence left the home of his brother, his mind was always alert. He had scanned Luke plenty of times before leaving, and found out his ‘signal’, or whatever it should be called, stayed the same. There was no trace of Loki, or no more than usually, to be exact - a small flicker of his little brother was always there. Perhaps Luke really was in control now. Who knew, maybe finding out exactly what the matter with his memory losses and odd feelings had been had been the key; now that Luke knew, he could go on with his life again. He wasn’t free, not completely, but at least he knew the truth.

 

*

 

“Liz, hi, I…”  
“I just wanted to explain…”  
“About yesterday…”  
“I never meant it to go that way…”  
“I didn’t want to lose you…”  
“Liz, please, you’re everything to me…”  
“I know what’s wrong now, and I believe I can fix it! I only need your help… Please, Liz, pick up the phone…”

Liz’s phone had been ringing constantly all morning. She had taken one glance at the screen, sighing. She didn’t want to answer Luke. She didn’t want to hear his voice, she didn’t  _need_  to hear it; the pleading tone, the apologies… She had read about cases like this, men who abused their girlfriends, and she didn’t want to be one of those poor women. She was stronger. She could move on. She  _would_ move on. She loved Luke, but she simply couldn’t.

Then she listened to his latest voicemail. He sounded desperate, worried and anxious, and she couldn’t stand it anymore. She had to at least hear what he had to say. If he was making up excuses or being simply delusional, she promised herself, she would hang up. She would only listen to him if it was actually something new. And it was.

“What is it?” she asked, trying to keep her cool despite the butterflies that still flew inside her stomach every time she thought of him.  
“Oh, Liz, thank god!” Luke exclaimed, sounding immensely relieved. “How are you? I really want to apologise for yesterday,” Luke said, not taking a breath between his words.  
“You said you knew why it happened now?” Liz asked. “Please tell me there’s another reason than just that you ‘snapped’ or something like that…”  
“There is, Liz, there is! I’ve figured it all out!”  
“So what  _is_  it, then?” Liz asked, her voice still a bit cold.  
“It’s complicated… Would you like to meet me somewhere so we can talk about it? Or I can come to yours, anything you want?” Luke said, sounding slightly more hopeful with every word.  Liz thought it over for a while, trying to choose between her fear and the fact that she loved him and didn’t want to push him away for nothing. She could at least hear what he had to say, right?  
“Ok,” she said finally. “Come to mine. Tonight, at seven. That ok?”  
“Yes, yes, Liz, it’s very much ok! Thank you! I’ll be there,” Luke said, and Liz could hear he was smiling now. Maybe there still was a chance for them…

 

*

 

Seven o’clock came almost too quickly: no matter how hard Liz tried to calm down, she was nervous. Why that was, she wasn’t even sure. It wasn’t like Luke was a violent beater of women, so what was the point? Yet, she couldn’t help it, she just couldn’t soothe her racing heart and sweating palms. When the doorbell finally rang, she was almost relived; at least the wait was over.

Opening the door, she saw a very apologetic-looking Luke. He had even bought her flowers.  
“Listen, I know these can’t possibly make up for what I did… But I hope it’s a start,” he said, smiling a small, hopeful smile. Liz returned it with a bit more tight-lipped one, but at least she managed to draw it on her face.  
“Thank you,” she said, “and please come in.” She opened the door more, letting him in. As Luke walked past her, she took in his appearance, thinking something was different. It was only when he had taken his jacket off and turned to look at her that she realised what it was. The observation almost made her laugh, it was so odd.  
“Since when do you wear leather trousers?” she asked, smiling a more genuine smile now, gesturing him to follow her to the living room.  
“Oh, I’ve had these for years and thought today just would be a good day to wear them,” Luke said, shrugging and laughing nervously as they sat down.  
“Do you mind if I cut straight to the business?” he asked as soon as they were both settled. He seemed almost as nervous as her, making Liz relax a bit - someone who was up to something bad wasn’t usually nervous, right?  
“No, please, tell me what is it,” she said, leaning forwards just a bit to listen to what he had to say.  
“I met the strangest man yesterday,” Luke began, smiling at how odd his words sounded. “And believe me, what he told me actually makes sense,” he said, proceeding to tell her what happened after she had left his flat. When he was done, Liz just stared at him for a while, not knowing which one of the two men was more insane.  
“So… You believe him?” she asked finally.  
“I do,” Luke said solemnly. “And for everyone’s sake, I hope you do, too.”

 

 


	9. Falling Apart

_London_

“Why?” Liz asked, slightly puzzled by Luke’s odd statement. “What does it matter what I believe?”  
Luke sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opened them and looked back at her, she couldn’t help gasping and pulling back instantly. The strange, bright green was back in his eyes.  
“Surprised?” Loki asked, amused by her reaction; her fear was so obvious he could almost smell it in the air. “Didn’t you have any doubts at all? Are you really  _that_  stupid, girl?” he asked, shaking his head. “Mortals…”  
Liz stared at the man in front of her, unable to move or think or even try to come up with some kind of a plan. It wasn’t the threat of violence or injuries that terrified her; it was the fact that this man had been her friend for years, and now something horrible had happened to him, turning him into this appalling creature. What it had been, she didn’t know or understand, since his strange behaviour seemed to go on and off. Sometimes her old Luke was still there, and sometimes… Sometimes it was this man, convinced that he was Loki from the Norse mythology. Liz took a deep breath, deciding that she wouldn’t even try to make sense of it, she needed to focus on getting away from the situation she was in right now. She turned her gaze to the clock on the wall, then everywhere else around the room; trying to focus on the things that were still normal. Time hadn’t stopped, she still had a picture of her little sister on the wall, her phone was still on the side table…  _Her phone_. Slowly, Liz turned her eyes back to the man, but her hope faded away as soon as their eyes met.  
“Now, now…” Loki said, smiling a twisted, cold smile. “We can’t have you phoning anyone, can we? That would ruin all our fun…” he said quietly, almost in a whisper, and stood up. He went to the table and got her phone, then threw it on the floor unceremoniously, stepping on it to make sure it was definitely useless.  
“Much better… Now, my little girl, what shall I do with you?”  
Liz didn’t say a word, just watched Loki as he slowly walked back towards her, like a predator to his prey.  
“I think… There’s something we need to try…” he said quietly, mostly to himself. Liz had just time to wonder what that could possibly be, when he pulled his hand back and slapped it across her face with force. She fell back on the sofa, lifting her own hand to her cheek and glaring at him.  
“Not hard enough, it seems…” Loki muttered, coming closer and grabbing her wrists, then binding them together behind her back with some sort of rope he had got from somewhere.  
“Well, good things come to those who wait, isn’t that so, my dear Liz?” he asked as he yanked her up from the sofa and sat her down on a chair in the middle of the room.  
“And we have all the time in the world…

 

*

 

It was the longest evening of Liz Morris’s life. The first slap wasn’t the end of it, oh no. At first she had no idea why Luke - or Loki, since he did really seem to believe he was the god from ancient myths - was doing what he did. She thought he was simply insane. What had triggered this sudden madness, she had no idea. But then, as time passed and he assaulted her body over and over again, he said something that put it all in place.

“Yes… I can feel him weakening, this is really breaking poor little Luke… Soon I’ll be myself again…” he breathed, his eyes staring like a maniac’s before his hand pulled back again, only to land on the side of her already bruised face.

 

*

 

“It is working…” Liz heard his words as if from behind a veil; she was barely conscious, and she suspected she had actually passed out a few times already. She wasn’t feeling it anymore, though - she was perfectly numb. Every hit, every way he made her hurt, bleed, or even possibly break her bones - none of it mattered anymore. She only wanted to get away. Death would have been a relief, but that was the only thing he didn’t give her. She could feel the dried blood on her cheeks, and every single bit of her body was aching. And even still, he wasn’t satisfied.  
“It should have worked by now… He can’t be this strong…” Luke muttered. Liz’s left eye couldn’t see as well as it used to; she was fairly sure some of the blood had run over it, too, gluing her eyelashes together. But she could still make out the shape of him as he paced in front of her, having left her alone for a surprisingly long time. After a few more moments he stopped, and turned his gaze back on her.  
“What do you think, girl? Should we try some more, to get your precious little prince to finally leave my head?” he asked, moving towards her again. Liz shook her head weakly, but knew it was no use; he did what he wanted, and there was nothing she could do to stop him. If only someone would come, anyone..  
 

As if someone had heard her silent prayers, she heard a strange sound somewhere in the room. It was something like the _whoosh_ cars made as they sped up past you, but not quite. Somehow, it was more subtle, more… eerie. Liz turned her head a bit, trying to see, but she could see nothing in the darkness that had spread into the room as the sun set and night crept in. Luke, whoever, had frozen in place. His head snapped towards the far corner of the room, behind Liz.  
“What are you doing here?” he hissed, his face twisted with anger. Liz closed her eyes, hoping that whoever it was would be someone friendly.  
“I came here as soon as I sensed you were back,” a man’s voice said. It was deep, calm and soothing, and somehow she was instantly sure that the stranger was no threat. She let out a quiet breath, feeling a slight relief. Perhaps she would come out of this alright, even if none of it still made sense…  
“And what do you hope to achieve here, then, _brother_?” Luke asked, spitting the last word at the other man. Hearing his words, the man slowly walked forwards, until Liz could see him from the corner of her eye. He was  _huge_. He was tall, even taller than Luke, long-haired, and muscular. He was wearing simply jeans and a red t-shirt, but around him was an aura of power even Liz could sense.  
“I came to explain something to you, and judging by the state of this poor girl here,” the man said, nodding towards her, “you really need to hear it.”  
“Well, what is this vital information then?” Luke asked mockingly, sitting down on a chair opposite her and crossing his legs, looking perfectly relaxed. “That she is my chosen one? That she is immortal? Oh, sorry, seeing how her life is slowly trying to leave her I take that’s not the case. What is it, Thor? What do you want to tell me? Please don’t tell me this is something from Odin again, didn’t he already have enough of his so-called revenge?”  
“It’s not from Father,” the man - Thor - said slowly. “Although it has something to do with his actions, and yours, too.”  
“Oh please go on, I don’t have all day here…” Luke said impatiently, clearly annoyed by the presence of the other man.  
“You do, actually,” Thor said, sitting down as well. “Firstly, stop trying to break the girl, she has done nothing. You won’t accomplish anything by doing that. There is no way you can get ‘Luke’ out of your head, Loki. Luke _is_  you, and you are Luke. He is the man you could have been, or still can. You only need to accept him, accept  _yourself_ , Loki.”

 

For the first time during the whole awfully long night, Liz saw that Luke - Loki?- was at a loss of words. He stared at the empty space in front of him, not saying anything for a long while. When he finally spoke, his voice was different, not as hard and cold. He sounded  _hurt_.  
“So Odin separated a part of me? Pushed the rest of me away, hid the part of me that didn’t fit into his idea of a perfect family? Pushed away the monster, once again?”  
“Yes,” Thor said quietly, “although that’s not the whole truth. You had to be punished for your actions, and knowing nothing else would help, he took away your memories, taking everything that made you behave the way you did away from you. He only left what was good in you, it seems. I do not know what he sought with this, but I hope he has gained that, because I do not see any progress at all, you’re still just as evil and twisted as you were…” His voice faded away, a look of sadness and disappointment on his face. “Leave this madness, Loki, leave it behind and come back to us. Be the man you once were. Come back to me.  _I miss you, brother_.”

 

 


	10. No Turning Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter!

Loki stayed silent. He didn't know what to say, how to reply to Thor's desperate plea. Did he believe the story? Did he want to change? And, most importantly, even if he did, could he?

Liz watched Luke and the other man, almost intrigued. They were both quiet, but even then she could see that something was passing between them. She hadn't understood much anything about what the huge blond man had said, but she had got the most important bit: he wanted Luke to change back to who he was. To her, there was nothing in the world she wanted more than that, so she plucked up her courage and opened her mouth.   
"Umm... Luke?" she said, her voice a little hoarse. Both of the men snapped their heads to her direction. She could see the intensity in their gaze, and wondered if this was that great an idea after all... _Well, I opened my mouth already, it's too late now,_ she thought.   
"I think... I think this man, Thor - your brother? - has a point," she said, gathering more confidence with each word. "I love you, Luke, but this, this _monster_ who beat me up... This isn't you. I love you, and I need you. Please go back to who you were if you can." Liz stopped there, looking at Luke, her eyes pleading with him to become the man she had loved for so long.

He could see the emotion in her eyes: the affection, the hope, the strong desire to will him back to who he had been. He almost hoped he could do that, settle down with her, forget again who he had been. But there was no way he could do that. He had to choose another path.   
"No," he said flatly but unquestionably, and turned his back on both of them, walking to the door and quickly shutting it behind him as he left the house.

Both Thor and Liz looked at the door for a while, hoping Loki would come back. When a few minutes had passed they both slowly gave up, and turned their eyes away.    
"Would you mind..?" Liz asked quietly, looking first at Thor and then at herself, still sitting tied to the chair.   
"Oh, yes, of course," Thor said absent-mindedly, and freed her, casting a worried look at her. "Are you OK?" he asked, eyeing her injuries.   
"Yeah, yeah... I just need to go to bed  and get some sleep and..." she mumbled, rubbing her wrists with her hands.   
"Thank you, for saving me," she said then, and gave him a quick hug, surprising Thor.   
"You're welcome... Are you sure you're OK? I could stay for a while, just to make sure you're alright," he offered, unsure of leaving her alone just yet. Liz looked at him for a moment, then decided he was trustworthy enough, and nodded.  
"I guess that wouldn't hurt anyone," she said, managing a small smile at him.

*

Loki was walking aimlessly on the streets of London. He had no idea where he was going, or what he would do; he just walked. He had forgotten to take his coat with him, and the evening air was getting chilly. He felt the goose bumps on his skin, and rubbed his arms with his hand as he walked on, hoping to somehow make everything right again. If only he could get back to who he had been...

He didn't know how much time had passed when he walked past a small restaurant. He slowed down, and looked inside through the window. The place was full of people, and Loki saw they all seemed happy and relaxed, just spending a casual evening together. The place was nothing fancy, just a family-friendly place to gather together and enjoy a meal.  The light shone into the dark street from inside, and Loki found himself feeling strange. A part of him wanted to join the people, to be happy and have fun. And another part -  a much bigger part - knew that wasn't possible. If they were so sure that he was a monster, that this part of him wasn't acceptable... he might as well prove it. He knew how to wreak havoc, he knew how to hurt, how to make them fear him... He was the god of mischief, after all.

*

"Do you... do you think he'll ever be the same again?" Liz asked quietly, turning to look at Thor. He was still there, sitting on the sofa next to her. Liz had showered quickly, and now she was wrapped into a blanket in her pyjamas, watching a film that happened to be on TV. She had expected Thor to leave as soon as he saw she was fine, but he hadn't. He had even cooked her a small warm meal, insisting that she needed something to eat after all she had been through. She hadn't objected, and after that they had both settled down in the living room. They hadn't spoken much; Liz was overwhelmed with everything that had happened, and she still wasn't sure about anything she had heard. But she had had enough time to think, and she had decided she needed to know if there was a way to get her Luke back.   
"I don't know, I honestly don't," Thor said, shrugging. "There's so much more to it than you can even understand... But it all comes down to his own willingness to change."  
Liz nodded, trying to make sense of Thor's statement. Luke's willingness to change? Well, if he could choose not to be borderline insane, then maybe...

After the film ended, Thor slowly stood up and stretched his arms.   
"I think I need to get going," he said with a slight question in his voice. Liz looked up at him, smiling.   
"Yes, I think you do," she said. Even though he seemed nice enough, she wasn't about to have him as an overnight guest just yet.   
"Thank you again, for everything you've done," she said as they both walked to the door.   
"Of course," Thor said, and looked her deep into her eyes, his bright blue eyes meeting her coffee brown ones.  "It's not the first time I'm cleaning up my brother's mess, believe me," he said and smiled at her warmly before opening the door and saying goodbye. After the door closed Liz wandered back into the living room, and sank down onto the sofa. Sighing, she closed her eyes just for a moment, hoping this would all be a bad dream when she woke up...

*

There was no blood. No screams. No pain... Oh well, there was pain, a lot of pain. Being a god had its advantages: even stripped from his powers, Loki was still stronger than any human, and much more cunning. He had them all trapped inside the restaurant in no time, without any way of getting away. They didn't even notice anything until it was too late. It almost made him want to laugh; it was as if they _wanted_ to die.

He wasn't the kind of killer who wanted to get his hands dirty. He had always preferred weapons, throwing knives or a cane, anything was fine as long as he came out of it as if nothing had happened. This time, however, he wanted the contact. He _needed_ to feel them struggle, the last straining breaths, the heartbeat, and then the silence. He took them out one by one, first the kitchen staff, then the people using the restrooms, and finally the ones in the dining area. There wasn't too many people, and because of the music no one noticed anything suspicious until it was too late. As he snapped the neck of the last customer and dropped the woman's body on the floor, he finally felt in control again. He was _Loki_ , not Luke, and he was above them all.

It would all have been perfect without one single flaw in his plan. If he hadn't been so sure of himself, so certain that nothing would go wrong, he may have noticed the young boy that escaped the fate of his family. He crept under the table and sat there, peeking through the tablecloth at the tall, dark stranger who had brought death into his life so suddenly. His hands were wrapped around his legs, and silent tears fell down on his cheeks. When the stranger passed the table under which he sat he held his breath, and when he couldn't see the man anymore a relieved sob escaped his lips.

A sob that Loki, standing by the door, could still hear.

Almost silently, he slowly walked back towards the table, using another route so that the boy couldn't see him. He stood right next to it for a moment, listening to the child's frantic sobs, and lifted the tablecloth leisurely.   
"Looks like I missed something, didn't I?" he said and looked down at the boy.

His intention when hearing the cries had been just to take that one more life, to feel invincible once more before disappearing again. But now, now that he looked down at the young mortal's tear-streaked face, something inside him changed. It was as if he was looking down at himself. Yes, the boy was older than he had been, and he had no memory of the war that had taken place in Jotunheim and resulted in his adoption, but the frightened green eyes and the messy black hair... He couldn't bring himself to end this life just yet.

"Don't be afraid, I won't hurt you," he said, turning away and trying to think. What could he do? He couldn't take the boy anywhere, he couldn't leave him there, and he definitely couldn't take him with him. "Dammit!" he muttered, kicking the leg of one table. Realising that probably made the boy even more afraid of him, he turned back around and knelt down in front of him.   
"I was just like you once," he confessed, "scared, and alone... I guess I still am. Do you have any family or anyone you know who lives nearby?" Loki asked, hoping that there was. If the boy would leave, he could leave the place and disappear as he had planned. It wasn't as if the police could ever catch him: his fingertips didn't match the any in their systems, and since his DNA wasn't even like a human's, they wouldn't do anything with it. It was a perfect crime, with just one dark-haired, sobbing flaw.

However, the flaw now nodded hesitantly, and whispered something that could have been "yes". Loki tried to smile, but it might have come across more as a grimace because the boy drew even further away from him.   
"Good," he said, standing up again and walking to the door. He unlocked it swiftly and held it open. "Go now, run there and don't turn back. You can tell them whatever you wish, it won't make a difference to me," he said. "Go!" he repeated, getting impatient when the boy didn't move. At this, the boy finally got up and ran out the door, never looking back. Loki shut the door and sat down at one table, sighing and considering his options. He had never been to Asia, perhaps he should try that... Or maybe Eastern Europe... Or even Scandinavia...

His thoughts were interrupted soon, when the door opened again.   
"I told you to stay-- Oh," he said, first thinking the boy had really been stupid enough to come back. But no, it was Thor, who else...   
"What have you done, brother?" he asked seriously.   
"I have... Well, I guess you can see for yourself," Loki replied, shrugging and gesturing around the room with his hand.  
"Yes, I have seen that," Thor said, sitting down and taking a deep breath. "But what I meant was... have you finally found your heart again?"  
"What?" Loki asked, frowning.   
"I saw the boy. I even talked to him."  
"What an idiot, I told him to go straight to where he was going to go..."  
"Oh, believe me, it was useful," Thor said, grinning slightly as if he knew something Loki didn't.  "I had almost lost my hope with you... I shouldn't have, I can see it now."  
"What the hell are you talking about, Thor?" Loki spat out, feeling sick of Thor's constant hints.   
"I am talking about your redemption. There was a way out of the spell Father cast on you, a way for you to redeem yourself... I just never thought you would use it. No one did," Thor said, now smiling more widely.  
"And what was that?" Loki asked, rubbing his temples with the tips of his fingers. He felt the beginning of a headache again, and wanted to get away from the restaurant as soon as possible.   
"It was you finding your humanity again. Finding your heart. Finding the goodness in yourself again. Small chance, but worth a shot, I'd say. Can you feel it already?" Thor asked, looking at Loki curiously.   
"Feel it?"  
"Yes, you're touching your head like you had a headache. It's not that, it's the spell again, leaving this time. You will be free again, brother, free to come home."  
"H-home?" Loki asked, not believing his own ears.   
"Asgard, yes," Thor said, standing up. "Come, brother, I think they are waiting for us. Father will of course want to have a word or two with you... But eventually, maybe, it will all be as it used to be." Loki just stared at Thor, his eyes wide and a small spark of hope growing inside him. He could go _home_? He hadn't expected that, not after all he had done, not after everything... He could go back to Asgard?  To return to the place he had grown up in, back amongst the people and places he knew? Oh, wasn't that just absolutely _perfect_.

Loki nodded, and stood up as well. Together, the two gods walked out of the restaurant and into the small parking area behind it.   
"Ready?" Thor asked, smiling cheerfully.  
"Ready," Loki replied, just the slightest hint of mischief in his eyes. Oh, all the possibilities...

The two men disappeared with a brief flash of white light. What they didn't know was that someone was watching them. Someone they both had met just a while ago. The green eyes stared at them trough a gap in a wooden fence, and even when the men were gone they continued to gape at the place where they had stood, his mouth hanging open.   
"Luke, come inside, it's cold out there!" his grandmother called him from the backdoor, and he nodded.   
"Yes, I'm coming, grandma!" he replied and ran back towards the house. He stopped by the door just for a moment, to look up into the sky. It was almost as if one of the stars was shining brighter that night...

 

THE END


End file.
